Enjoy the moment; Nurture yourself; Attract Success.
“I don’t know how to do it. How do I ever forgive myself?” my family member asked.
“That’s a big conversation. It might take many conversations. I want you to know that I believe in my heart that you did the best you could do with what you knew at the time,” I replied.
Much is made of the idea of compassion and self-compassion.
Still, many of us were trained that feeling guilty and angry at ourselves is the special way to “push ourselves to be good people.”
Years ago, I came across a phrase that has remained in my thoughts for decades.
“To love is to be happy with.” – Barry Neil Kaufman
We notice that this phrase is NOT “to love is to beat up, make feel awful, to shame, and to push around until a person feels like garbage.”
My father threw me into walls. That was not love.
I’m grateful that I had loving mentors later in life.
In the below 1.7 min. video, I mention three high school instructors who demonstrated compassion, kindness and coaching to me:
One taught me psychology—I earned a degree in psychology.
One taught me English literature—I wrote 27 books, screenplays—and I directed feature films.
One taught me theology—I wrote a college level, online Comparative Religion course that I teach—for over 13 years.
So I learned compassion somewhere else than from my father.
How to Really Nurture Yourself
Here’s something helpful: Have a simple principle to get to the compassionate action.
Ask yourself this question: “How would I act toward a good friend?”
Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend.
That, in a way, is a shortcut to caring for yourself in a self-compassionate manner.
Would you help your friend by giving him or her a good meal, time for appropriate sleep, time for fun and enjoyment? Of course, you would.
If your friend made a mistake, would you assault his or her ears with nonstop berating. No!
“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” – The Dalai Lama
Let’s return to this phrase:
“To love is to be happy with.” – Barry Neil Kaufman
I suggest that self-compassion can help you step forward to improved success and happiness. Part of my reasoning is that practicing self-compassion gives you more positive energy. Such energy will help you attract more opportunities.
Fear brings about much negative energy. Here’s a specific example. My sweetheart has crossed the line beyond “being on the heavy side” to being severely overweight and unhealthy. I fear that she’ll cross the line and fall into diabetes (like her mother endures).
My approach is to quiet down my fear and to support her. I do this by going on a long walk with her everyday. We walk 8,000 to 10,000 steps.
Drop the habits of fear and of using guilt to push anyone. Be kind. Be supportive.
My point is: Be kind to yourself and enhance and expand your positive energy. Take that energy and apply it to serving others and expand your prosperity, too.
Speaker-author of 27 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Nothing Can Stop You This Year!: How to Unleash Your Hidden Power to Persuade Well, Get More Done, Gain Sudden Profits, Command Intuition and Feel Great (Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE )
Just yesterday, during my meditation time, I experienced three valuable things.
If someone asked me, have you ever had a moment of feeling “enlightened,” I can say yes.
Let’s pause for a moment. “Enlightened” can be a loaded word.
I can say that during my meditation time, I felt lighter. I was relieved. Stress was gone! Upon reflection, I also know two things: I had a moment of “nothing to reject” and “an experience of take effortless care.” (The third experience was a “jump in time” — the meditation session seemed over so fast! It lasted minutes but it felt like “time jumped ahead.”)
Nothing to reject
Think of how much time we spend trying to correct another person. (In essence, we judge that something the person is doing is wrong, and we reject it.)
Recently, I said to a colleague: “Every time I interact with you, you correct me.”
He replied, “That’s my job.”
No, it is not his job. And being near this guy can feel exhausting.
In my meditation, I did not push back or reject anything. What a relief!
If you spend most of your time judging everyone and yourself, that leaves little time to simply enjoy the abundance and gifts that you do have.
This is a good reason for having a meditation practice even if it’s just 3 minutes a day. Get even just a moment’s experience of being free and comfortable.
Imagine feeling free of having to judge (and therefore reject) anything.
An experience of “take effortless care”
How much of your day do you spend “efforting”?
Are you always working?
Are you always trying to appear perfect? Always prepared? Always smart? Always with your emotions under control?
Do you get any time in your day when you are free of pushing and taking pains or making big efforts?
This is another good reason for having a meditation practice.
Yesterday, during my meditation practice, I let go of making efforts.
If my nose itched, I scratched it.
At one moment, I felt the intuition to rub my jaw area and ease stress out of it. So I gently massaged my jaw area.
I didn’t force myself to sit still.
No forced effort.
I did not force my mind either. My mind originated a thought: “Only goodness envelops me.”
That sounded good.
* * *
I invite you to consider daily quiet time, prayer time or meditation time.
Make a choice to connect with your Divine Source . . . you can call it Divine Love.
By the way, as I write this article, I do not have to search for love. I can simply be in a place of loving harmony.
Divine Source writes through me.
May you feel how blessed you are,
Warmly,
Tom
P.S. I’m looking forward to my guiding workshop attendees on October 14, 2015 in North Hollywood. The good news about having moments of connecting with Divine Source — I can trust that people who need to be at the event will be there. How about you? See this 1.6 min. video:
Tom Marcoux speaks and provides in-person processes
in North Hollywood, California
October 14, 2015. See 1.6 min. video:
You will scratch me under the chin; I Have the Power!
You want more and better in your life, right? Then STOP giving your power away.
“What do you mean giving my power away? I’m doing my job,” my friend, Serena, said.
“I hear you. For many of us, it’s really subtle in how we’re losing time, energy and focus to the ‘trivial many’ when we would do better in focusing on the Vital Few,” I replied.
We’ll use the N.O.W. process:
N – nurture your wisdom
O – overcome a mood
W – wake up to a “disempowering fixation”
Nurture your wisdom
What is the wise thing to do in a situation? You’ll often know the best course of action when you make space to pause, reflect and respond.
Some of us give our power away by saying “yes” too quickly.
Just today, a couple of PR people from publishers asked me to review some books by writing articles at one of my blogs. I immediately replied that I’d study their materials as soon as I could.
Still, I did not agree to reviewing the books too fast.
I’m really busy working with clients and leading teams in the United Kingdom, India and the United States of America.
I make good choices. How? I give myself “thinkspace.” I give myself the space and time to think through–and then make a good choice.
Another way to nurture your wisdom is to get access to much of the best thinking and case histories as possible. I consult my own coaches and mentors, and I read up to 81 books each year.
As an Executive Coach, I know my clients rely on me to serve in a number of roles as coach, business consultant, brand strategist, speech coach, and mentor. I need to be at the top of my game to help them with their game.
Finally, nurture your wisdom by removing certain distractions. That is, take good care yourself: enough sleep, exercise, good nutrition and breaks to refresh yourself.
Overcome a mood
Many of us give away our power to a current mood we’re in.
For example, I’ve written more than 2 million words (and 28 books). How? I do NOT wait to be in the mood to write. I sit down and start writing. For the first 5 minutes, I may feel that I’m writing garbage but I press on.
I develop patterns of high productivity, and I assist my clients to develop their own positive patterns.
“Inspiration usually comes during work, rather than before it.” – Madeleine L’Engle
“A professional is someone who can do his best work when he doesn’t feel like it.” – Alistair Cooke
Do not let a disempowering mood take away your power.
Do something to shift your mood.
During workshops, I teach audience members to use a power-move and power-phrase. For example, when I am tired, but still need to do some writing, I tap my fist on my thigh and say, “I CAN do this!”
By the time I ascend the stairs to the second floor of my home, I’m ready to get right to work.
Now it’s your turn.
How can you shift from a disempowering mood? What music energizes you? Or if you feel high strung: What music calms you down and soothes you?
Would taking a brief walk help you clear your mind?
Wake up to a “disempowering fixation”
Sometimes as I help clients build a brand up from “zero,” I see the client get fixated on something.
For example, some clients get stuck on doing perfect graphics for an ebook or CD cover.
I share with them this idea: “Making your first ebook is part of ‘making the running shoes’ and ‘we need you to get running.’”
For many clients with a new brand, they really need to get out there and do the marketing and selling—and not wait for “the perfect business card.”
Unfortunately, because it’s more fun or simply easier, a number of people get stuck in a “disempowering fixation.” Waiting until one has the perfect business card can be a disempowering fixation.
For example, someone who owns a company might get stuck in what is called an “occupational hobby.” Let’s say Stephanie started as a graphic designer, but now she runs a company with six employees. It’s better for her to concentrate on getting new clients instead of tinkering with Photoshop.
Do not let some fixation or even addiction take away your power.
Face reality and identify what is Most Important for you to do.
How do you discover what is most important? Often, it’s something you dread doing.
My phrase is: What you dread moves you ahead.
For example, you may dread updating your resume. But what is most important for your career?—updating your resume.
What’s the solution? Use the practice of “Worst First.” That is, you do the worst task early when you’re fresh. If you need to update your resume, work on it early in your day.
You have the choice to do better in life.
Pay close attention. Where are you giving your power away?
Remember the N.O.W. process:
N – nurture your wisdom
O – overcome a mood
W – wake up to a “disempowering fixation”
Doing better often is not about doing more, it’s about dropping what does NOT work.
Speaker-author of 27 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Nothing Can Stop You This Year!: How to Unleash Your Hidden Power to Persuade Well, Get More Done, Gain Sudden Profits, Command Intuition and Feel Great (Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE )
Want to avoid a standard point where people get stuck? It’s in ordinary—and ineffective—goal setting.
“I hate goal setting,” my friend Mitch said.
“Why?” I asked.
“First, I don’t know what to write. Second, what if I fail to achieve the goal? That hurts like hell,” Mitch concluded.
Goal setting can be rife with pitfalls. A goal that is too minor fails to motivate. A goal that is too lofty brings up all kinds of subconscious baggage and can torpedo your efforts.
Here’s the solution: It’s what I call 3 Levels Goal-setting.
In 3 Levels Goal-Setting, you set three levels of goals: Good, Excellent and Amazing!
Some people get stuck. They do not want to set goals that are too lofty because fear of disappointment is too daunting.
“How can I live with failing to hit my goal?” my client Serena asked (sort of echoing Mitch’s objection).
“When you use 3 Levels Goal-Setting, you’ll be able to work with such concerns,” I replied.
First, you set a “reasonable and good goal.” And then you can expand your thinking.
Here’s an example:
Good – Sell 30 ebooks per month
Excellent – Sell 300 ebooks per month
Amazing! – Sell 3,000 ebooks per month
(The reasonable goal or “Good Goal” takes the pressure off. At least, you’ve set an attainable goal.)
Setting an Amazing! Goal requires that you expand your thinking. And that’s great!
Often, we realize that to achieve an Amazing! Goal, we need to engage the help of other people. For example, an author who wants to sell 3,000 books would do well by connecting with other authors.
The process is: Have a book launch in which other authors make an announcement to their personal esubscribers lists.
One has each author offer a gift (often a downloadable audio program), which then brings more people to the individual author’s website. One gathers 15 authors with esubscribers lists of 10,000 each. That’s 150,000 people reached. With 2% buying one’s book, that’s 3,000 copies purchased.
Now it’s your turn.
Pick a goal and write down your ideas on the 3 Levels:
Your Goal – GOOD outcome
Your Goal – EXCELLENT outcome
Your Goal – AMAZING! outcome
Use the above Method to Maximize Your Progress over and over again.
“Replace worry with action.” – Steve Chandler
I’ve found setting goals and taking action to be an excellent process to relieve stress.
For example, Michael Eisner, former CEO of The Walt Disney Company, talked of an extreme health situation he endured. He said that once the plan was in place for his having quadruple bypass surgery that he was much relieved. All that was left was to have the surgery and go through the recovery process. Step by step.
This makes sense in light of how many of us feel better once a plan is in place.
To achieve extraordinary results, be sure to expand your thinking through the 3 Levels Goal-setting process.
Set 3 Levels of Goals, refine your plans and take daily action.
Speaker-author of 27 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Nothing Can Stop You This Year!: How to Unleash Your Hidden Power to Persuade Well, Get More Done, Gain Sudden Profits, Command Intuition and Feel Great (Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE )
Find your power; step forward and manifest your dream.
“I’m afraid,” my client Sharon said. “I can help you with that. I’ll introduce you to the process of ‘Bring the Safety Net Up With You,” I replied. We’ll use the N.E.T. process:
N – nurture your resources
E – expand your plan
T – target the purpose
Several years ago, one of my clients said, “I’m afraid. The higher I rise; the further I have to fall.”
I replied, “We’ll find ways to bring your safety net up with you.”
Nurture your resources.
“Nothing is impossible for the [person] who doesn’t have to do it himself.” – A. H. Weiler
Facing risk can be a scary time. It’s vital for you to look at all your current resources and to find even more resources. You do not have to step forward by yourself.
It is helpful to develop relationships with excellent professionals before you need them.
For example, I went looking for an entertainment industry attorney before I needed her to work on projects that I was going to do in subsequent years.
Barbra Streisand, at the beginning of her career, was helped by friends who let her sleep on their couch.
Now it’s your turn.
Answer these questions:
Who can help you?
Which professionals could assist you (attorney, accountant, financial planner, and others)?
As an Executive Coach, I often take on different roles of coach, business consultant, brand strategist, speech coach, and mentor. I currently lead teams in the United Kingdom, India and the United States of America. I have trained with my own mentors in leadership, top level speech-making and more.
I hire my own coaches and consultants so I’m constantly improving my strategic approach.
It helps for you to keep studying and reading. If reading is not your strong suit, consider listening to audio books. [My audio books are available on iTUNES – Be Heard and Be Trusted — and my other audio book Darkest Secrets of Persuasion and Seduction Masters: How to Protect Yourself and Turn the Power to Good – see the audio books when you CLICK HERE]
Expand your plan
To face risk in an effective manner, look at the whole situation. A number of people refer to this as “look at the whole chessboard.”
Have multiple plans.
Answer these questions and write down your answers in your plans:
What if the first phase of your project does not work? How can you recover?
How can you minimize the damage?
How can you go into action quickly?
How can you keep the budget modest, so you do not risk the whole company?
The team that made $100 million with the Thighmaster product, began with a plan to develop and market eight products. The first product did not work, and Thighmaster was product #2.
Many years ago, I was flown into Utah as a finalist to be a trainer for a top time management company. It looked like the articulate, blond woman gained that position.
Sure, I was disappointed. I did not stop. Instead, I “got on another horse.”
I immediately rented a church and held my own time management workshop using my own proprietary methods. The workshop started me on the path to giving 6 speeches at the annual conferences for the National Association of Broadcasters, Washington, D.C. And that led to my teaching graduate students and college students for 15 years.
It’s great to have multiple plans.
It’s like having multiple irons in the fire because you do not know which particular iron will become red hot.
Now it’s your turn.
Write down an Expanded Plan.
Include:
How you can recover if Phase One of your project does not work out.
How you can fall back and do something else while your revise the project.
How you can keep finances going as you develop your project.
I’ve interviewed a number of people who have successfully conducted crowdfunding campaigns.
One person I know raised his rent-money by offering to make a simple website for people who donated $100.00. A number of people took up his offer.
Many times, a money problem can be converted into a “find another way to serve people” solution.
Target the purpose
When you truly connect with your purpose for a project or your “life-direction,” you can be flexible and jump at multiple opportunities.
I’ve learned that being out in the world and finding ways to serve others brings on more opportunities.
Many years ago, I served a group of job-seekers by giving a presentation at the San Francisco Employment Development Department. I taught skills to help people develop their effective personal brand.
My purpose was to be helpful to these people who were hurting due to enduring a job loss.
One attendee came up to me and said, “You should speak for XY company.” This led to over $312,000 worth of work.
Now it’s your turn.
What is your purpose?
Do you want to entertain people? Can you do it as a writer, actor, singer—or some combination?
Do you want to lift people’s hearts? Can you do it by giving a speech? – revising a speech for someone else? – co-writing a book?
* * *
When you’re facing a risk, see if you can pause and do some strategic planning.
Take a long view. Keep looking to expand your skills and experience.
Speaker-author of 27 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Nothing Can Stop You This Year!: How to Unleash Your Hidden Power to Persuade Well, Get More Done, Gain Sudden Profits, Command Intuition and Feel Great (Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE )
Tom Marcoux enjoys helmet diving, walking on the ocean’s floor.
As I walked on the ocean floor, I took a deep breath and smiled. This was accomplishing one of my Big Dreams.
As a boy, I was thrilled by watching the Disney live-action feature film 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. I saw a team of men walking on the bottom of the ocean.
Later, I enjoyed James Cameron’s film The Abyss which also included deep sea divers.
To get to the point of walking on the floor of the ocean, I had to overcome two fears related to Sharks! and to the claustrophobia of wearing a diving helmet.
Some days before my trip to the Grand Caymans, I practiced wearing a hood and visualizing that I was fine while wearing the helmet and walking on the ocean floor. Positive visualization helped.
I also asked about the presence of sharks, and I was informed that where I was diving sharks found the noise of various ships and the busy port to be off-putting.
Here’s what I call the “Miracle Moment” to Really Achieve Your Dream: It’s the moment you connect with Something More Important than Your Fear.
Fulfilling my dream of walking on the ocean’s floor was more important to me than my fear.
Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgment that something is more important than fear.” – Meg Cabot
Now it’s your turn.
Take a sheet of paper and write down your answers to these questions:
What is your Big Dream?
What do you want to do?
What fear(s) are connected to what you need to do to accomplish your Big Dream?
Finally . . .
What about your Big Dream is More Important than Your Fear?
This is connected to what you want to feel when you’re realizing your dream.
As an Executive Coach, I often help clients move beyond their comfort zone and to accomplish extraordinary things. I help my clients connect with Big Energy (which is heartfelt) and then they have something More Important than their fear.
Take the time to really connect with what moves your heart. Then, from this foundation, spring up and make progress to accomplish your dream.
Speaker-author of 27 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Nothing Can Stop You This Year!: How to Unleash Your Hidden Power to Persuade Well, Get More Done, Gain Sudden Profits, Command Intuition and Feel Great (Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE )
Tom’s Book: Power Time Management: More Time, Less Stress and Zero Procrastination available at Amazon.com
Imagine a time when you’re running fast — from appointment to appointment, errand to errand. Work is slamming you hard with overtime. You can barely catch your breath. And you’re not sleeping much. Ugh. Pain.
Here’s a helpful idea: “Better than zero.”
Do you feel that you don’t have time for exercise?
At one point, my sweetheart and I visited another city and stayed at a friend’s home. I got my exercise in by suggesting that we all take a walk.
Now there are some people who scoff at a walk instead of running or hitting the gym. And to that I reply: “Better than zero.”
And there are times when I apply the “Power of 10″ (10 pushups, 10 sit-ups, 10 palm strikes, 10 side kicks and so forth). It just takes a few minutes.
(For more about making the best of your time, see my book, Power Time Management — see a Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE)
How about expressing your love to your romantic partner? Pick up a card while you’re getting groceries. No time to get the perfect card? Pick a good card and write your own endearments to augment the message printed in the card. Don’t have the words? How about reminding your loved one of good moments shared on a vacation and write: “Thank you. I treasure those moments with you. I love you.”
I always remember this quote:
“We do not remember days, we remember moments.” – Cesare Pavese
How to Make Progress On Your Dream:
Do not wait for the perfect time! See if you can grab some progress anytime you’re waiting. For example, some hours ago, I was in a recording studio working on music. While the recording engineer worked on improving the sound of each track (we use multiple tracks), I walked in the hallway. I completed 2379 steps of my daily 10,000 steps. While I walked, I had my pen and notepad out to write notes related to my next speech.
Speaker-author of 27 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Power Time Management: More Time, Less Stress, and Zero Procrastination (Your Breakthrough for More Success, Happiness and Time Off) (Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE )
“Help! My dream’s slipping away from me,” my friend Serena told me. She had endured years of yo-yo dieting. Her weight plummeting and rising up to a worse level than before the diet.
“Here’s what will really help — a new approach to working with goals,” I replied.
Have you been afraid of setting an ambitious goal and then failing – and then facing humiliation?
Success and fulfillment arise, in part, due to a strategic approach to goal setting and goal-achievement. We’ll use the A.I.M. process:
A – adjust for the long game
I – intensify systems
M – measure the empowering way
Adjust for the long game
Some people avoid goal-setting because they want to avoid pain in the forms of disappointment, frustration and embarrassment.
The truth is: everyone faces some frustration and disappointment even if they’re just trying to have a quiet life. But the important point is: without goal setting and goal-achievement, you will miss out on feeling good about yourself and about your life in general. Setting a personal goal and making progress yields feeling hopeful!
Look at “the long game.” By this I mean, look at building your whole life, not just some temporary setbacks that you might call failures.
For example, among my 27 books on Amazon.com, three of them do not sell at all. Some might call those books failures. Instead, I look upon those books (and writing them) as stepping stones. To this day, I use my research and writing from those books every semester when I teach graduate students and college students. So nothing was lost.
Writing those books was part of my “long game” plan. In writing 27 books, I’ve done so much research, so much thinking and so much creating of material. I bring these developments to every speech I give.
Now it’s your turn.
How can you set a small goal and remind yourself that it’s all part of your life-path? Remember small steps add up for your better life.
Tom Marcoux speaks and provides in-person processes
in North Hollywood, California
October 14, 2015. See 1.6 min. video:
Intensify systems
Instead of setting a tough goal and gritting your teeth and hoping to stay on your vigorous schedule, place a new system into your life. That is, a system for taking action that becomes a natural part of your day.
For example: recently, a colleague asked me to help her make sure that she rehearses enough for her next presentation.
I asked, “What do you do everyday?”
“Brush my teeth,” she replied.
“How about rehearsing your speech for 3 minutes immediately after you complete brushing your teeth?” I suggested.
“I could do that,” she replied.
Then I suggested that she set up a reward for herself when she completes three sessions of rehearsal.
Now, she had an empowering system of both specific actions and rewards.
Now it’s your turn.
What do you want to make sure that you do on a daily basis? How can you reward yourself for taking action?
As an Executive Coach, I help my clients set up a personalized system that ensures that they make progress and feel good on a daily basis. The process is about consistent action and rewarding yourself for incremental progress.
Measure the empowering way
Some people find it too painful to endure the emotional roller-coaster of weighing themselves everyday. A solution is to check one’s weight only once a week.
Still, we do well when we focus on three important details about measuring: a) what, b) when, and c) meaning
For example, when I wanted to drop weight, I had these details:
1) What? What is my belt measurement? (I was glad when I had slimmed down to three notches slimmer on the belt.)
2) When? I programmed weighing myself once a week.
3) Meaning: The belt measurement was more important to me than the weight number because I was also doing weight training. Weight training builds muscle, and muscle fibers weigh more than fat or other tissues. So, for me, the weight number was NOT the only meaningful measurement.
Now it’s your turn.
How can you identify the three elements (what, when, and meaning) of using empowering measurement? What will you measure? How often? And what does the measurement really mean towards your accomplishing your larger goal?
A Word about Setting a Goal and Feeling Embarrassed
My friend “Jackson” set a goal of dropping 20 pounds in 90 days. His result? Only 5 pounds. He was truly disappointed.
To be supportive, I mentioned the concept of a “growth mindset” (a concept originated by author/researcher Carol S. Dweck.)
When we have a growth mindset, we take a “failure” or setback as a natural part of the process. So my friend only dropped 5 pounds. That’s in the right direction! So now, he can look over his measurements. Did he walk 10,000 steps each day? No. Perhaps, that’s a big part of how he did not achieve his 20 pound weight loss goal.
Now, he can start again and change his behaviors. He can improve his approach and get better and better results. He can use a growth mindset.
When you set goals, sometimes, you’ll get disappointed. Sometimes, you may even appear to fail—in front of others. In my video “How to Believe in Yourself When Others Don’t [CLICK HERE to view the 7 min video], I said, “Measure by your heart, not their approval.” It’s understandable to feel embarrassed when you seem to fall short of a goal.
Here are two ways to deal with this:
One: only tell supportive people about your goal.
Two: Hold strong and realize that no matter what you do or do not do, someone will criticize. It’s just a fact of life. Eleanor Roosevelt said: “Do what you feel in your heart to be right – for you’ll be criticized anyway.” So take the calculated risk. Create some forward motion in your life. Truly, you’re the only who really cares about what good you can create in your own life.
When I talk about overcome fear, I mean that you do not let fear stop you from taking action. So choose your goal. Choose carefully with whom you share your goal. And even when others criticize, be your own cheerleader because you have the courage to step forward, learn and keep going.
I invite you to make your own standards (what is in your heart), more important that what others say. Tell yourself (and even sometimes tell others), “I’m making progress. I’m learning as I go. I’m getting better at this. I have a good trend going.”
Consider setting goals according to the A.I.M. process:
A – adjust for the long game
I – intensify systems
M – measure the empowering way
Each day you can make progress.
I say that any step forward is Better Than Zero.
The best to you on your journey.
Warmly,
Tom
Tom Marcoux,
CEO
Speaker-author of 27 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Nothing Can Stop You This Year!: How to Unleash Your Hidden Power to Persuade Well, Get More Done, Gain Sudden Profits, Command Intuition and Feel Great (Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE )
Tom Marcoux plays a keyboard in a recording studio.
Everybody was against Disneyland: Walt Disney’s wife, his brother/business partner Roy O. Disney and the board of directors. Still, Walt Disney persisted. How? Two things. We begin with “want power.”
1. Connect with your Want Power
A lot of people talk about willpower. Often, they say, “I’d lose weight if I just had more willpower.” There’s something stronger. It’s “want power.” What do you really want? If you look deep, it’s really a matter of a feeling you truly want to experience.
So what feelings do you really want to experience?
Disneyland is a show. . . . Disneyland is a work of love. We didn’t go into Disneyland just with the idea of making money. – Walt Disney
By the way, this is the 60th Anniversary of Disneyland. Thank you, Walt for your persistence. Here is my video celebrating Walt Disney’s Strategy for Success:
Imagine loving what you do. I made my first film at nine years old, and I have been a storyteller ever since. Currently, my team and I are working on my trilogy of graphic novels Jack AngelSword (and ultimately a series of feature films). What gets me to work many days in a row, including weekends? Want power. I want to experience the joy of collaboration. I want to hear the laughter of an audience responding to a film I make–or a speech I give.
Identify what you really want and find your unique source of personal energy.
As an Executive Coach, I help my clients connect with what they want in their hearts. From this base of powerful energy, we work together to make a strategic plan. And then I support the client as he or she takes effective, consistent action.
So the process is: Want Power –> Plan –> Effective Action –> Goals accomplished.
2. Listen and Feel Your Intuition
Where does the energy to persist come from? Your heart and your intuition.
Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma—which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. – Steve Jobs
Your intuition is uniquely your own. No one can really tell you what steps or path will really work. Why? Because it comes from your heart.
I dream for a living. – Steven Spielberg
Many of my projects–a film, a science fiction graphic novel (TimePulse), an audio program up on iTunes–begin with an intuitive thought and feeling. It’s like a momentary “dream.” It’s really a vision of how I’ll serve some form of audience and how I’ll feel good while creating the project.
If you can dream it, you can do it. – Walt Disney
So take a moment. What do you dream of? What would you enjoy doing? Don’t just think of some “reward.” What activity would be a reward in itself, that is, what activity would feel rewarding as you do it?
Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. – Steve Jobs
One of the “matters in my heart” is a musical that I’m writing and composing. [You can see me at the keyboard in a recording studio — in the photo that accompanies this article.]
I’m setting this musical in San Francisco, the city of my birth and many years of my life. I’ve written a significant portion of this musical thus far. My intuition lets me know that a number of people could be moved by both the music and topics in the musical. This project is something that I tinker with as time permits. I’m more focused on serving people as an effective Executive Coach and Spoken Word Strategist. Still, I keep making progress on my musical.
What type of creativity arises from your heart?
Let’s continue with Steve Jobs’ comment: “The only way to do great work is to love what you do.”
I have a couple of friends who say, “Not everyone can be a Steve Jobs.”
That may be true.
However, I’ve noticed that the people who feel really alive are the ones who put their heart into their work.
And what about this comment “Not everyone can be a Steve Jobs”? What is that? Could it be, for some people, just an excuse to avoid digging deep and finding their own purpose and joyful way of approaching life?
We also face the reality that not everyone is going to do passionate work for a living. And that’s okay. Margaret, a poet, may make no money writing poetry. She may work as an administrative assistant to support herself and her son. What if her friend Sarah says, “Why don’t you stop writing poetry and learn to write technical manuals? You can make money doing that.”?
Instead, let’s leave it to Sarah to find her way of living with joyful moments each day. Let each one of us live a life of creativity and expressing ourselves.
Imagine an orange in your hand. You cannot get the juice if you do not squeeze.
How do you get the “juice of life”? Two things: Connect with your Want Power and listen to your intuition.
When you do that, you open up a new chapter–an empowering and invigorating chapter– of your life.
YourBodySoulandProsperity.com Arrives in North Hollywood, California – October 14th, 6:45 pm.
Workshop: “Your Body, Soul and Prosperity — 3 Easy Steps to Massively Increase YOUR Health, Happiness and Prosperity” **The Experiential Workshop** Wednesday October 14, 6:45-9:45 pm. Share the news with friends. Thank you. Many blessings. *********************************************************************************************
Warmly,
Tom
Tom Marcoux,
CEO
Speaker-author of 27 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Nothing Can Stop You This Year!: How to Unleash Your Hidden Power to Persuade Well, Get More Done, Gain Sudden Profits, Command Intuition and Feel Great (Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE )
Tom Marcoux records an audio book – in a recording studio.
Fear can strangle your dream. Just as bad, fear can paralyze you. Many people get stuck because they cannot do something perfectly. That is, their fear of appearing “imperfect” stops them from taking action. Perfection has its place–like when a surgeon operated on one of my family members years ago. However, most things only need excellence. So . . . set your own criteria for excellence. That is, identify what you must do to make the project excellent. Let go of perfect. Focus on excellence. How? Ask yourself these questions before you take action on a new project:
1. What must be in this project?
2. What can be left out?
3. How long do you have to work on it?
4. What does the end user expect to find in this project?
5. How can you surprise and delight the end user?
These questions and your answers serve as a starting point for a strategic plan. When you develop such a plan, you can set criteria for excellence.
You decide what is most important for your project.
As an Executive Coach, I help my client set up a strategic plan. Even better, we identify how my client can take important steps forward even while feeling fear.
From interviewing a number of successful people, one theme arises: The successful person took effective action even while feeling fear.
Don’t let your fear shut down your dream! That is, do notlet your energy be wasted in trying to gain approval from everyone. The fear of loss of approval can paralyze many of us.
Instead of focusing on approval, focus on truly living your life in a joyful and fulfilling way. Your joyful life is built on listening to your heart and intuition.
Your intuition calls you to expand, to experiment, and to take an appropriate risk.
Your fear calls you to contract, to hide, to avoid an appropriate risk.
Heed the call of your heart and your intuition.
I have faced fear many times: acting in feature films, directing my first feature film, speaking to large audiences, singing in a band, recording my first audio book, appearing as a guest expert on television, and other occasions. The idea is to avoid waiting for fear to go away. Instead, seek to quiet fear down a bit.
To quiet down your fear, set your criteria for excellence. Consciously focus on letting go of trying “to be perfect” and “to get everyone to like you” or “to get everyone to like your project.”
“The only things I regret… are the things I didn’t do.” – Joe Karbo
“Go to the effort. Invest the time. Write the letter. Make the apology. Take the trip. Purchase the gift. Do it. The seized opportunity renders joy. The neglected brings regret.” -Max L. Lucado
Take a step forward.
I know this to be true. In directing my first feature film, I filmed the first scene until I filmed the last scene. I edited the first sequence until I edited the last sequence. It was all one step after another.
“You don’t learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing, and by falling over.” – Richard Branson
YourBodySoulandProsperity.com Arrives in North Hollywood, California – October 14th, 6:45 pm.
Workshop: “Your Body, Soul and Prosperity — 3 Easy Steps to Massively Increase YOUR Health, Happiness and Prosperity” **The Experiential Workshop** Wednesday October 14, 6:45-9:45 pm. Share the news with friends. Thank you. Many blessings. *********************************************************************************************
Warmly,
Tom
Tom Marcoux,
CEO
Speaker-author of 27 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Create Your Best Life: Unleash Your Charisma and Confidence to Change the World(Free Chapter when you CLICK HERE )
Grab FREE ebook: “Develop Your Extreme Confidence and Seize Advantages in Business and Life”
Book: "What the Rich Don't Say About Getting Rich: Work Smarter, Live Better"
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