“I’m afraid,” my friend Gena said.
I did a lot of listening. Ultimately, Gena expressed that she was afraid that her life would not get better. No matter how she tried, something kept crashing down.
Along the way of a couple of conversations, I was able to share with her an idea that she found truly helpful.
“In truth, I am a verb.” – Steve Chandler
One of the most miserable people I know, “George,” lost a huge part of his identity. When his knees gave him trouble and he stopped running, he lost the identity embodied in “I am a runner.”
He lost his name (or “noun”) for himself. A sad thing is that he continues to wallow in his grief, and he does find new actions and a new identity.
This is NOT for you.
We have another option. “In truth, I am a verb.”
This idea is the first step of Real Freedom. Labels like “shy boy,” “runner,” and others can limit our thinking and our possibilities. When I was a shy boy, I did actions like a shy boy.
I moved forward and did courageous actions, which made me a courageous person in subsequent years (high school, college, and beyond). Pick your actions—in truth YOU are a verb.
How do we get to the place of real freedom?
It’s by using Empowering Questions. For example … as an Executive Coach, there are times when I wake up at 4:45 AM with one of my clients’ situation on my mind.
My intuition served up two powerful questions for my client Alex:
- What goal scares you?
- What would you be doing if money and “realism” did not matter?
Certainly, “realism” matters. I call myself an OptiRealist. I’m optimistic that we can take action and make our lives better. Still, I’m realistic that we need strategic plans, coaching and rehearsal for the High Impact Moments of our lives.
Still, a default to thinking “that’s not realistic” can choke our creativity. Do NOT let that happen. So if some naysayer says, “Do you know how few people make a living doing that?” – do NOT let such limited thinking stop you. Okay. Maybe you’ll just add another stream to income to your life. Or maybe you’ve found a new hobby brings more LIFE to your life. Either way, you enrich your life journey.
Here are other Empowering Questions:
* What’s your gut telling you?
* What are you hungry for?
* Where’s the fun?
I’ve also written about these questions:
* Who do you want to help?
* How can helping them help you heal a part of yourself?
(This final question relates to doing something that really resonates in your being.)
Now it’s your turn. Pick some of the questions above. Let them guide you to thinking in new ways. Break free of your habitual thoughts.
Remind yourself: You are a verb. That is, change your actions or add new actions and you enjoy new freedom.
Expand your world, expand your actions, learn as you go.
Experience your Real Freedom.
Warmly,
Tom
Tom Marcoux
CEO (leading teams in United Kingdom, India and USA)
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