When I heard of Wayne Dyer’s death, I was inspired to write these words and share with Facebook friends:
Wayne Dyer’s death, but more importantly, his life means a lot to me.
I’m glad that I was able to meet him and give him a hug. I’m grateful that I wrote to him, and he wrote back and gave me a couple of his books. On the day of his death, I was listening to a video he recorded in 1980. On the day he was making his transition, I was called to listen to his words. Many blessings to Wayne, his family and all of us who benefit from his work. I’m only sharing a few words at this moment. In honor of Wayne, my thought is: “Express your light.”
Upon reflection, I thought about what gets in the way of our Expressing Our Light.
- Others drown out our Heartfelt Voice
The answer is: Acknowledge it’s your destiny and not theirs.
Here’s a way you can stay strong even when you feel all alone and deeply disappointed that loved ones do NOT support you in your making your dream come true.
Perhaps, like many people, your loved ones are afraid. Maybe on a subconscious level they’re afraid that you’ll get hurt as you step out of your comfort zone. Or even, they feel uncomfortable being around someone so focused and striving to fulfill his or her potential. Maybe they fear that you’ll change and leave them behind when you do succeed on a significant scale. Sometimes we lose friends. Top author and speaker Larry Winget wrote: “Some friendships are like belts. We outgrow them.”
Here’s an important point to realize: Other people cannot feel what you feel or intuitively know what you know. Why? It is YOUR destiny—not their destiny. You’re the one person who has all the clues and internal signs that your idea is a valuable one.
Perhaps, you’ve felt the gut-wrenching disappointment when a loved one does NOT support you in your pursuit of something that’s close to your heart.
There is an answer that I learned about from my neighbor who races motorcycles competitively. He said, “In motorcycle racing, we’re trained with the idea: If in doubt, gas it out.” The idea is to “pour on the gas.” My neighbor assures me that if there’s an irregularity in the road, more gas will help the motorcyclist get over the small ridge.
How can we apply if in doubt, gas it out? First, look to yourself for confirmation and energy. Add things that empower you. Often, when I’m writing I’m listening to empowering music. I read empowering books and I see uplifting films.
The point here is: You must take action to keep up your own spirits.
- Fear strangles Your Connection with Your Intuition.
The answer is: Identify with your intuition
Above, I invited you to listen to yourself for confirmation.
Just because someone close to you cannot see or imagine your idea that does NOT mean that they’re right! It just means that they cannot feel the value of your idea.
Identify with your intuition and not their fears.
Many things that turned out well took time. For example, it took 8 years and many studios turning down the feature film Splash before it was produced, and Ron Howard directed the film. In fact, Disney turned it down the first time, and it was not until Disney created a new division, Touchstone Pictures, did Splash (starring Tom Hanks and Darryl Hannah) get made.
A truly famous example is how co-authors Mark Victor Hansen and Jack Canfield held to their intuition and endured 140 rejections before their book Chicken Soup for the Soul was published. The Chicken Soup for the Soul series has resulted in 250 titles and more than 500 million books sold.
Go by your intuition. Do not rely on others to “have all the answers.” So-called experts can be wrong. You may be providing something that is new and different.
How can you recognize your “voice of intuition”?
Here’s a quick description of two “voices.”
* Voice of fear: contract, hide, do not experiment
* Voice of intuition: expand, build, take appropriate risks
Every day and really every moment, we have a choice. Do we grow and expand and step toward our destiny? Or do we contract and hide and let doubters bring us down?
I invite you to nurture yourself and step forward in a steady pace to create new and better in your life.
- Your fear of loss of approval has you hide your light.
The answer is: Measure by your heart and NOT their approval
In a way, I’ve been lucky that my father is stuck, for decades, in a disapproval mode. I’ve learned to listen to my own heart and ignore his negativity. The truth is he has had no experience related to being an entrepreneur, graduate school instructor, author, and feature film director. Sure, he has opinions—uninformed opinions. And I’m so glad that I ignored his narrow-viewed advice. My life has been so much more of a joyful adventure than merely playing it safe. His constant refrain is “survival.” I’ve replied, “That’s not enough. I want to thrive!”
For more encouragement, see my 7 minute video: “How to Believe in Yourself When Others Don’t”:
Do you have someone close to you who simply does not support your vision?
Walt Disney’s own wife, brother/business partner and board of directors were all against Disneyland. Why? There had never been a theme park before. In fact, Walt’s wife Lillian asked Walt, “Why do you want to do an amusement park? They’re so dirty.” Walt replied, “Mine will be clean!”
Walt measured things by his own heart. In fact his first thoughts about creating an amusement park began in 1911 when, as children, he and his sister would stand outside the gates of a Kansas City amusement park. It was not until 1955 when he opened his own gates of Disneyland. Can you hold on to an idea for 44 years? Will you take steady steps forward?
Novelist Greg Bear told me that it took 10 years for readers to discover one of his novels.
My point is that some dreams take several years—and several starts and stops and moments or months of discouragement.
Plenty of people, often those closest to us, will express their doubt. As emphasized in this article, it’s really only natural because you are the one who hears your personal and unique “music and vision.”
Nurture yourself and your vision.
Get coaching and continue your efforts to learn more and more.
Although many of us grieve that Wayne Dyer has passed away; we can celebrate the Light that is in You.
This world needs people who hold to their vision and persist. Thank you!
Tom Marcoux speaks and provides in-person processes
in North Hollywood, California
October 14, 2015. See 1.3 min. video: