“Can somebody really be fearless?’” my client, Stephanie, asked.
“I’ve helped so many people escape the prison of fear — including my clients, MBA students and the actors I’ve directed in feature films. It’s really about developing a healthy relationship with fear,” I replied.
Top actor Kenneth Branagh said, “I used to call it fear [stage fright], but now I call it excitement because it is more useful.”
Over the years, I’ve worked as a stuntman, clinging to the hood of a cherry-red classic Chevy Truck racing at 60 miles an hour—only holding on by my fingertips. As an introvert, I’ve stepped in front of an audience of 703 people as I gave a speech at the National Broadcasters Association Conference in Las Vegas.
I’ve learned to stop fear from running the show.
Here’s an Excerpt from my book: Shape the Future, Lead Like a Pro: 3 Skills Every Great Leader Needs to Succeed [click here to look inside the book].
When you’re in action, you’re focused, and fear is a quiet voice in the background.
While I do meditate (briefly) each day, I note that my clients and I just need to get fear to quiet down—and we can move forward effectively.
(Sure, a monk, with meditating six hours a day, may eliminate most fear. Still, I’m interested in working with you in the here and now!)
Unchecked, fear can paralyze people. Fear can suck the air out of the room.
Instead, we focus on generating empowering energy.
This relates to one of my favorite quotes:
“Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgment that something is more important than fear.” – Meg Cabot.
My own wife elaborated on this idea. She said, “Tom, if you were in trouble, and I was scared to go over there—I’d still go over there because you’re more important.”
I immediately gave her a kiss and hug.
How Can You Manifest Your Courage?
Focus on what is meaningful to you—something that is more important to you than fear.
Now it’s your turn. Write down your answers to these questions: “What’s most important to me? What means more to me than something that scares me?
Let’s Look at the Connection Between Meaning and Happiness
Think about it. Where can you derive empowering energy? It comes from what you find meaningful. (If you do something meaningful, you have a source of happiness and good feelings.)
** End of Excerpt **.
Here’s how you live in a “Be Fearless” way:
1) Quiet down fear.
Through rehearsal and coaching, you condition your mind and body to perform in effective ways. Your mind gets to the point of “I’ve got this” and “I know what to do.”
For example, as an introvert, I used to feel fear and nervousness in meeting new people at a conference. Now, I have a strategy: To listen a lot—which calls for asking good questions. At a conference of heart-centered business owners, I’ll open a conversation with: “So, how do you help people?” That opens the door for the other person to enjoy telling me what he or she does.
2) You live more moments free of fear.
I’ve learned that getting through the first two minutes of a speech opens the door for me to feel less fear. How? I’ve learned to turn my attention away from “how am I doing?” (a fearful place) to “How are YOU doing?” – as I focus on the audience.
In focusing on the audience, I am not in the fearful place. I am in the place of serving the audience.
We return to:
When you’re in action, you’re focused, and fear is a quiet voice in the background.
If you do not let fear stop you, you’re actually fearless.
Remember: Rehearse and get coaching—and shift your focus to serving your listeners—and you’ll live more moments free of fear**.
Spoken Word Strategist – Executive Coach
Speaker-Author, 44 books so far 🙂
** If you’re interested in the next time I’m running my online course The Introvert’s Formula to Get Clients, send an email to tomsupercoach [at sign] gmail.com. You’ll become eligible for a discount.
PitchPowerFest.com * GetTheBigYes.com
Soar with Confidence: An Executive Coach Reveals Secrets, Lies and Countermeasures So You Excel Like Top CEOs and Leaders – Pitch, Lead, Succeed
Get the Advantages to take your business to a higher level. Learn Leadership Advantages, Pitch Advantages, and Success Advantages. To Soar with Confidence, you learn and use principles for top level communication to board members, team members and the media.
“Marcoux demonstrates how to “Prepare a Compelling Story that Moves Emotions.” He mentions techniques that he teaches clients for developing compelling Ted Talks.” – Dantalion Jones
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Learn the vital skills of pitching your ideas and enrolling others into your vision. Get that “Big Yes” to funding your project. “This insightful book shows you how to zing a curveball right past the parts of the Hollywood exec’s brain that want to say no before you even make your pitch. You will learn what works when pitching, and more importantly, why, so you can get to YES much more often. Buy this book now. Consider it Spring Training before the big game.” – Danek Kaus
Darkest Secrets of Persuasion and Seduction Masters: How to Protect Yourself and Turn the Power to Good
This invaluable guide, used by people in 15 countries and now in its second edition, will help you become immune to dark persuasion. Learn to use countermeasures to defend yourself against unethical persuasion and seduction tactics. Break any trance in which a salesperson is trying to get you to buy something not to your benefit. “Learn how to defend yourself against manipulation. Best book you’ll ever read to protect yourself, feel strong and move forward in your life. Highly recommended!” – Dr. JoAnn Dahlkoetter
Secrets of Awesome Dinner Guests: What Walt Disney, Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, Albert Einstein, Martin Luther King, Jr., Helen Keller, and John Lasseter Can Teach You About Success … (The Power of Your Personal Brand)
Imagine dining with Walt Disney, Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, Albert Einstein, Martin Luther King, Jr., Helen Keller, and John Lasseter. These seven people share one thing: They’re great communicators. So this book will help you become a great communicator. “Marcoux especially stresses the importance of personal branding, of coming across as trustworthy and dependable.” – Einar Masson
What the Rich Don’t Say about Getting Rich: Work Smarter, Live Better
You want wealth, abundance and enjoyment–yes? Wouldn’t it be great to learn the real strategies that the Rich use to create Sustainable Wealth? This book takes you behind-the-scenes to what really works. You’ll see a lot of myth-busting, and you’ll learn the strategies that get real results. “Tom Marcoux gives you an inside look on the psychology of what it takes to be successfully wealthy in life. It’s more than just taking advantage of opportunity, but also about taking care of yourself. This book discusses a number of strategies that we often overlook when it comes to leading a successful life that leads to wealth generation.” – Barry Adamson II
Amazing You: Enjoy the Power to Get It Done, Get Stronger, Get Credit for It … featuring Secrets of Extreme Confidence
Would you like to Amaze yourself? This book helps you Get Stronger so you can Get It Done! You’ll learn how you can Get Credit for It! All three elements are crucial so you rise to a higher level of success and happiness. Think about it. If you get it done, but you’re a physical wreck—you lose. If you get things done, but you don’t Get Credit for It—you cannot get new clients. And, you’ll lose your current clients—if they don’t know, in their gut, how their lives are better because you’ve brought them significant benefits. Here’s a secret: You can unleash the Amazing You! Executive Coach Tom Marcoux helps you develop Extreme Confidence. “Tom Marcoux, once again, has written a book filled with practical insights and veteran business expertise that allows individuals to acquire the tools to balance personal and professional life. Tom’s wisdom possesses depth and the experience of someone who has ‘walked the walk.'” – Dr. Arthur Ciaramicoli
Darkest Secrets of Charisma: Overcome the Lies about Personal Magnetism, Get People to Feel Your Charisma and Influence Others with Your Words
Learn how you can tap into your natural gifts and tendencies to radiate Three Types of Charisma. Discover how to influence people with your words. “Marcoux explodes this myth: Charismatic people always feel comfortable before and during an important event, such as public speaking, networking or some other social event. This book shows how you can feel discomfort but still come across as confident and charismatic.The secrets include ways to radiate all three forms of charisma Marcoux describes as Warm Trust Charisma, Natural Charm Charisma and Magnetic Charisma.” – Danek Kaus
Receive Your Gifts: Abundance with Ease
Shape the Future, Lead Like a Pro: 3 Skills Every Great Leader Needs to Succeed
This book will empower you with the 3 Skills every Great Leader needs to succeed: Relate, Optimize and Intuit. Learn to excel as a RoiLeader. The Bottom-line: You need an “unfair advantage” of top communication skills. Use Expansive Thinking to handle Disruption and get out ahead of it. “Shape the Future, Lead Like a Pro empowers you with essential leadership skills. Integrity is the foundation of Authentic Leadership. This book helps you lead and retain people who appreciate true leadership and who will excel for your organization.” – Christopher Salem, Host of Sustainable Success Radio Show
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